So Far…So Good.

2nd February 2015

snoww

It’s been a couple weeks since I have made a blog post. Every time I sit down to write, I go through all of my notes I keep weekly, nothing anything that is remotely interesting, or inspiring that is happening in my life at the moment (yes, my little notebook is full of scribbles, such a nerd…but praise evernote!!) Anyways, as I’m sitting here piecing this post together, I find myself battling a severe case of writer’s block, still. Enough has happened and it seems worth mentioning, but I started thinking of how much I care about this blog and my commitment to it.

I commit, as I’m sure most others, to different things daily. Commitment to me, is a risk, because in order to become committed to anything big or small; a job, hobby, story, people, style or even a new hair color, there has to be passion driving me. I do care (probably too much) about most things in my life, so commitment for me is a pretty natural, reoccurring element. This also opens the window for me to be completely vulnerable in many aspects, which is also extremely terrifying.

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True Heroine.

15th January 2015

heroine

Today, I was fortunate to meet someone who has left an impression and showed me the true meaning of optimism and faith. I didn’t receive the initial phone call, but when I found a note on desk for a story idea, I called back and was a little hesitant to the interview I agreed to. I knew very little about this person, I knew she was a drug addict, lost her husband and now her life has forever changed. I wanted to know more, and the interview could have gone a million different ways, but today I felt fortunate I said yes to this story.

She walked in and we went to back room so I could interview her, and the first thing she said to me was that she loved my outfit. Immediately, I could tell she was a kind person and also very nervous, but we once we sat down she opened up and told me her traumatic story. She had a history with drug abuse and when she and her husband experimented with heroin for the first time, she has no recollection of the night. She woke up in a hospital three weeks later to find out that her husband had died, she missed his funeral and their heroin was mixed with lethal amounts of meth, cocaine, rat poisoning and paint thinner. Suddenly, my “problems” felt minuscule and vain.

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“A Paper Girl in a Paper Town”

14th January 2015

brick

Reading is an escape that I’ll never be able to depict infallibly. Recently, I have been on a huge John Green kick. One thing that stands out in each of his books I’ve read so far is that the female lead, is always such a strong character on her own. She doesn’t “need saving” and the male lead isn’t a stereotypical, knight in shining armor. Sometimes, he’s a nerd, and I love this because this feels more like real life. I finished reading “Paper Towns,” the other night and this book made me really think about people and current relationships.

In the book (sorry for spoilers, but you still need to read it!) Quentin and Margo were childhood best friends. They were next-door neighbors and even discovered a dead body together. Years later… life happened. Margo was beautiful and popular and Quentin, was not. They had two totally different groups of friends but one night Margo climbed through Quentin’s window and asked him to go on one revenge journey, truly an offer he (and any sane human) couldn’t refuse. They had a memorable night and the next day at school, Margo never showed up and it’s later discovered she ran away, leaving clues for Quentin. He enlists some help from his friends and one of Margo’s friends to help find her, when they begin to discover the real Margo, the independent, crazy and even a little depressed, Margo. They finally begin uncovering the real life version, not the picture perfect person they all thought they knew.

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“Dare to be the optimist”

9th January 2015

winter

I will be the first to admit that I completely loathe winter. I am never warm enough, travel becomes difficult when it’s even a possibility and sky remains a consistent gray hue. It is so simple being sucked into a negative perspectives, and become cynical but in the words of one of my newly favorite characters, Hank Moody, it’s time to, ‘Dare to be an optimist.” One thing I will admit to love about my least favorite season is the snow.

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Just Breathe

29th December 2014

badday

There are days when nothing gets in my way and I feel unstoppable and ready to take on anything crossing my path. I know I can do anything, or at least I’m confident I can make a gallant attempt. I hope for these days because it feels good to feel good. Today, was not one of those days. Today was Monday, and definitely one to remember, and I hope to not repeat.

Everyone in the office this morning seemed to be in an off mood. Some people are still on vacation, and others, including me, were coming down from their holiday high. I was off to rough start this morning right away because I had the worst night’s sleep, and I woke up late, but I did manage to wear a new outfit that unfortunately was appropriate for my mood for the rest of the day. All black. When I went into the office, nothing was working. My page layout was all over the place and any attempt I made at piecing everything together wasn’t working, and it took me an extended period of time to finish and it, which made me the last one to meet deadline. At this point everyone was silent. This isn’t typical with my group of co-workers, but this didn’t last long because suddenly, two people cracked, and the room exploded.

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What the what the?

22nd December 2014

califonic

I recently started watching “Californication” because I love David Duchovny and a good netflix binge. I’ve learned two things as I’m approaching season 4.

1.Even if something feels right, doesn’t mean it is
2.I’m staying clear of any men from L.A. (slightly kidding)

In the beginning of the series, I was really hoping for the big Karen/ Hank reunion. I really wanted them to work everything out and get their acts together and embrace their true feelings and raise Becca as normally as possible. But alas, they are still in limbo even though she left her husband on her wedding day, only to jump in the back of Hank’s convertible.

Hank can’t conquer who he truly is, which he shouldn’t. He wants to save all women and that makes me love him, but mostly hate him at the same time. I have found myself now hoping that Karen and Hank will just remain civil and not end up together. It is evident from the way they seem (so far) that they should be together and spend the rest of their lives together, but they just keep tearing each other apart.  Just because something is so painfully obvious, doesn’t mean it should actually be anything at all. This is what makes things so difficult to understand sometimes because it’s so hard to deny something that makes sense and feels right. It’s especially hard because I know what I want and when it doesn’t work, it is devastating.

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Shopping With Heroes

18th December 2014

cops

I haven’t really been in the Christmas spirit this whole month. Last weekend, I went to see “A Christmas Story, The Musical” at the theater, and that put me a little closer, but still not in full Christmas mode. I don’t know if it’s because it hasn’t snowed much (yet) or what it is exactly, but I was starting to think that my Christmas spirit wasn’t going to fully hit until it was actually Christmas day. That completely changed tonight.

Working this cops beat has been an interesting ride so far. I’ll admit, most of the stories I write aren’t glamorous and are usually written with negative connotation. Tonight, was completely different. Tonight, I traveled with 14 officers and 12 children ages 2-10 and their families to go Christmas shopping. This event is called “Shopping with Heroes” and it truly brought the meaning of Christmas to life.

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Hello, Bombshell

10th December 2014

VS

Last night, as many others I am certain, I watched the Victoria’s Secret fashion show. This isn’t something I started watching until I was in college. All of my girlfriends would always gather in our living room with wine and usually  we would quickly regret the pizza we were shoving in our mouths. We continued to sit in awe watching these seemingly perfect women strut down the catwalk. We all wanted to be them. I wanted to sport my own pair of angel wings and leave an impression like they did with me. This year, there was something was different about the show. This year I found myself envious, but not because of their toned abs, or their muscular legs that are twice the length of mine or that they are all apparently best friends with T-Swift. This year, the first thing I noticed about these women was their confidence.

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Famous Last Words

2nd December 2014

obits

Working for my local newspaper for a few weeks now has certainly taught me a few things and makes each day a new experience. I am in my daily routine now of collecting arrest and accident reports and communicating with the sheriff’s department on a daily basis. Of course, with all the excitement coming from the police department and court systems, there is also the surge of stress when it comes time to write an obituary. I didn’t think I would enjoy this part of the job description and I really thought it would be more depressing, but it turns out, even the most absurd things can still teach a valuable lesson.

I was writing one of my very first obituaries the other day and I was warned that it was “a different and trickier obituary” in comparison to the others. As I started writing about this man’s life, it struck me suddenly, that there are so many rules to writing these, because this is potentially the final thing written for someone.

Suddenly, I was terrified.

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Taking a Turn on the Dark Side

25th November 2014

green

I was sitting with my nana the other morning and as we were sipping on our freshly brewed coffee, our conversation shifted dramatically from Christmas decorations to her asking about my life. My nana and I have such an unique bond, and I can tell her anything, and I really treasure our conversations, especially when it is just between the two of us. I looked at her and in the most maternal tone she asked, “so, are you happy?”

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